Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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