8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
third nipple confirmed
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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