I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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