woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
