at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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