i think i have two assholes
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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