i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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