Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I'm really busy with my period
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