You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
