IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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