EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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