It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
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