i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I woke up under a house in Key West
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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