Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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