dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
