doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
