omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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