I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
