it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize