He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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