I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
