yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
