come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
