Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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