also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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