She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
