I can't breathe out the right side of my face
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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