I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize