You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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