He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
