Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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