her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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