But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
