First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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