My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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