Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
