so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Randomize
