If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
