i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Randomize
