Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You pole danced in your parka.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
