standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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