guys are not supposed to queef...right?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You are the jesus of drinking
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
