dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
