At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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