She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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