there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize