Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
