i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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