Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Is it penis luge time yet?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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