Dual....:-)
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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