This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
